Night Spies | Night Spies | Chicago Reader

Night Spies 

This Week at: Simon's

Sign up for our newsletters Subscribe

I was moseying down the street when I noticed this bracelet in the window of this leather store near Broadway and Belmont. It was this very manly, thick wrist-wear type thing, and I dig that so I decided to go in. This burly, bearded man was sitting behind the counter with a contented scowl on his face--not a mean guy by any means, but certainly he looked like he'd been working hard. He had black soot on his arms and was smoking a cigarette. I said to him, "That's a really sweet bracelet in the window there--how much?" and he took a pull off his cigarette, looked me straight in the eye, and replied in the deepest, manliest of voices, "That's a coooooooccccccck ring." The whole bottom dropped out from under me--I couldn't contain my laughter. I thought he'd laugh with me but he didn't; he just looked serious and took another pull on the cigarette. I giggled like a schoolgirl and pointed out another one next to the first and said, "OK, how about that one?" Then he took another pull, smiled, and croaked, "Now that's a bracelet--and it don't go on your cock either." When I reiterated the story later that evening here with my friends they were all like, "You didn't know that about cock rings, huh?" I guess I know now. --Domenico Rocco, librarian

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

More by Stephen Gruhn

  • Night Spies

    This week at: Jake's Pub
    • Dec 30, 2004
  • Night Spies

    This week at: The Edgewater Lounge
    • Dec 23, 2004
  • Night Spies

    This Week at: Laschet's Inn
    • Dec 16, 2004
  • More »

More by Richard Knight Jr.

  • The R-Rated Momoir

    An Annoyance alum gives the genre a raunchy tweak.
    • Sep 28, 2006
  • Oral (and Anal) History

    Owen Keehnen's been writing "beat-off stories" for two decades, but his latest project is letting gay porn stars tell theirs.
    • Jun 1, 2006
  • Aloha, Pigface

    How James Teitelbaum grew a tiki cottage industry on Martin Atkins's dime.
    • Apr 14, 2005
  • More »

Tabbed Event Search

Popular Stories