Michael Tony | Chicago Reader

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Re: “The worst roommates I've ever had

Their names are Chris and Marissa Perkins. I could spend my time writing slander against them but I think just telling the story will serve better.
I met this couple last December when they replied to my ad for a new roommate, at the time I had to deal with the previous roommate leaving without paying rent and causing problems so I thought that this couple would be far less trouble and that I could actually trust them (boy was I fucking wrong….). So against my better judgment of just handing the room to another person that was more than willing, I held out the room until they moved from Louisiana. When they arrived on the 17th of December, the room was cleaned and at a perfect state, so was the rest of the apartment for that matter. I shook hands and spoke with their father, which was the one that was gonna be paying for the first couple of months (First sign of trouble: still relying on parents for income) and I discussed how I wanted things to work around the house, which was basically keep it clean. I didn’t have them sign any contract that day which is something I heavily regret (not as much as choosing them though). From then on I had an uneasy feeling, but rather than act on those feelings I did my best to help these individual out. I took Chris around looking for a job for him and his wife, assisted with his search with looking into joining other branches (hard to believe this spineless punk was/is a marine or at least a reservist). I let them use my LCD TV and stand for their room and let them use our dishes, my other roommate also let them use some of the stuff in the bathroom, our living room TV, Fridge, and damn near everything else…. It didn’t take long to see that these individuals were not only extremely dirty but also lacked respect for our place in general. The kitchen was always a mess because Chris was a horrible cook that never cleaned up his own mess, the never cleaned dishes, in fact they would horde dishes in their room which after my wife found out, and they secretly got a lock for their door, which I though was off because they would lock our dishes in there. They also left rotten, smelly food in the fridge which was spilled one morning all over the floor which prompted a house meeting. They constantly argued which was loud enough for us to hear which as quite embarrassing on C’s part because he literally was spineless in the relationship, no back bone whatsoever and Marissa was a bitch, a manipulative bitch straight up. I won’t need to say more about all of this because it will become evident later.

Fast forward to late April, they were a lil late with their payment which is no surprise since they never was on time, I told them pay me when you have it. That was on a Sunday. The next couple of days was the same, until Wednesday which I came home from work to find out Chris and Marissa was 90 percent moved out, without any heads up and paid me 80 dollars stating rent was prorated( something they thought of)and left. I was heated but It wasn’t over. They left all of their food, which was a lot, trash, a dirty room and other stuff. Every time I tried to contact them over the matter, I could never get a solid reply if anything at all. So I contacted their father who said he would speak to them but never really did… two months later, I was still trying to get them to reimburse me for the junked room. I sent heated texts to let them know just how I felt about the whole thing, still no reply so I call their dad, I get nothing… later that week I get a call saying I posted their number online from their father which couldn’t answer his phone previously for reasons unknown…then I get a call from my landlords over the issue and pretty much fucked my whole living situation just to get out of paying for damages.
As you can see, these individual are low, dirty, evil motherfuckers. Spineless, disrespectful, ungrateful and anything else you can think of. I don’t think I gotta say don’t let them in your living area.

4 likes, 3 dislikes
Posted by Michael Tony on 06/04/2013 at 9:58 AM

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