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The Chicago Reader

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Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jul 23, 2020
If I’m in love, then why do I want to sleep with a hot barista?

The culture tells us cheating is a relationship-extinction-level event.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Monogamy, cheating, attraction

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jul 7, 2020
Just another cuckin’ monogamous couple

It’s possible to enjoy lesbian cuckolding fantasies and not open a relationship.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, cuckolding, fantasy, monogamy, lesbian

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Oct 23, 2019
School for sexual scoundrels

How can inveterate cheaters find happiness? Facing up to facts is a start.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, cheating, sexual scoundrels, ethical slutdom, polyamory, open relationships, DADT, slut shaming, kinks, infidelity, monogamy, co-parenting, GGG, good, giving, and game

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Oct 16, 2019
A life lesson from the great James Baldwin, and more

Advice on growing up, giving love a chance, and getting rid of Dad's porn
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, sexual attraction, monogamy, polyamory, porn, age difference, Grindr, James Baldwin

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jul 31, 2019
The seven-year yawn

What's a young married gal—bored with vanilla sex and into BDSM—to do?
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, BDSM, open marriage, polyamory, Wednesday Martin, Untrue: Why Nearly Everything We Believe About Women, Lust, and Infidelity Is Wrong and How the New Science Can Set Us Free, monogamy, BDSM clubs, vanilla sex

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Nov 15, 2018
‘I've always wanted to tie girls up, but I can never convince a woman to let me’

Tips for getting into bondage without being a menace or a creep. Plus: Dan issues the fastest DTMFA ever!
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, bondage newbie, bondage singles websites, BDSM, bondage, Justin Gorbey, kinkster, kink, munches, play groups, kink social groups, kink education groups, FetLife, nonmonogamous, monogamy, oral sex, DTMFA, Dan Savage, Savage Love, GGG, good giving and game, dump the motherfucker already, dominatrix, pro dom, pegging, strap-on

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Oct 10, 2018
‘Help, I'm a real-life 47-year-old virgin!’

Dan offers advice for losing it in middle age, handling potentially destructive secrets, and more.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, marriage, monogamy, cross-dressing, explicit photos, Facebook, Instagram, virginity, personals ads, cheating, friends with benefits, FWB, open relationship, polyamory, open marriage

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Apr 25, 2018
A serial adulterer makes a case for himself, and gets reamed

Plus: What’s good for the gander is good for the gander.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, adultery, serial adultery, monogamy, ethical nonmonogamy, open relationships, affairs, divorce, couples counseling, cuckold, cuckquean, kinks, cheating, nonexclusive relationship

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Feb 28, 2018
‘Should I be worried about STDs from oral sex?’

And other no-brainers from the slush pile
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, knife play, fetish, masturbation, dogs, STD, oral sex, gay bathhouses, open relationship, ass play, monogamy, marital affair, blow job, Instagram, spanking, GGG, good, giving, and game, DTMFA, dump the motherfucker already

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jan 17, 2018
WTF? A medical mystery becomes the talk of the dungeon

Dan Savage advises a professional dominatrix about a client's alarming behavior, and more.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Mistress Echo, Dan Savage, savage love, dominitrix, dungeon, vampire, hematospermia, bloody ejaculate, medical mystery, foot fetish, elderly sex, foot worship, foot model party, monogamy, Dr. Stephen H. King, unconditional love

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Sep 20, 2017
When the nice lady has a penis . . .

Dan Savage advises a straight guy encountering a “mental block” after learning the woman he’s been seeing is transgender, and more.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, pre-op transgender, transgender, chicks with dicks, homophobia, transphobia, Evan Urquhart, Slate, nonmonogamy, monogamy, gaslighting, self-sabotage

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jul 6, 2017
Lad wants ‘slutty’ girl, threesomes, cuckolding, etc

Is it crazy to be considering a reconciliation? Plus: Is my boyfriend using me for my mattress?
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, kinks, cuckolding, slut fetish, monogamy, nonmonogamy, hot wife, one-night stands, George Santanaya, fancy mattress

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jun 22, 2017
Odd woman out

Dan advises a monogamous straight woman who's become smitten with a man who's poly, and more
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, monogamy, polyamory, new relationship energy, Franklin Veaux, More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory, open relationships, avoidant attachment style, cuckoldry for the nonfan

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love May 17, 2017
Does childbirth commonly change women's ability to orgasm?

A PIV-focused husband wants to know. Plus: a closeted bisexual's dilemma, and a couple hard-core alternatives to Viagra
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, female orgasm, PIV sex, Jennifer Gunter, clitoral stimulation, monogamy, bisexuality, dating apps, the closet, erectile dysfunction, Viagra, Trimix, Caverject, monster erections

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Apr 12, 2017
When there’s incompatibility in the bedroom

Should you just suck it up or what? Plus: not “secretly gay” but “actually bi”
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, sexual incompatibility, threesomes, monogamish, monogamy, bisexuality

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Feb 4, 2016
'What do you think of poop play?' and more

Dan Savage takes further questions from a live audience in Boston.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, Savage Love Live, Boston, Wilbur Theatre, poop play, threesomes, foursomes, monogamy, polyamory, magnum condoms, blumkins

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jan 22, 2016
What to do—and what not to do—with used sex toys

Plus: what counts as monogamy, apps that can help keep hookups safe, and more
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Kitestring, Oregon militia, monogamy, Dan Savage, Savage Love, sex toys, safety apps, bachelorette parties, dildos, racist boyfriend, DTMFA, Bundy militia

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Nov 19, 2015
The wrong way to approach a monogamish relationship

Yes, you can betray a willing cuckold. Plus: single and sad, the Sondheim cure vindicated
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, savage love, monogamy, monogamish, cuckold, Stephen Sondheim

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Oct 2, 2015
How not to be an asshole

Two cheaters and a fickle young cad fess up to bad behavior.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Savage Love, cheating, asshole behavior, relationships, rough sex, monogamy, drunk sex

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Mar 12, 2015
To tell or not to tell and other quandaries

A later-life dilemma posed by a statutory rape, yet another sexless marriage, and more
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, statutory rape, Dinesh D'Souza, monogamy, monogamish, Folsom Street Fair

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Mar 5, 2015
You're a cuckold, I presume

Dan decodes a cry for help. Plus: an average, ordinary case of mismatched libidos, the HUMP! amateur-porn fest comes to Chicago
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Savage Love, Dan Savage, cuckold, intimacy, sex drive, polyamorous, monogamy, asexual, HUMP!, amateur porn, sex-positive, birth control

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Oct 23, 2014
A trans man's dilemma

Will a ring scare off male prospects? Plus: a libidinal turn of the tables, a very deeply squicky fantasy, and more
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Savage Love, Dan Savage, trans guy, open marriage, swingers, monogamy, marriage equality, religious conservatives, masturbation, high libido, sex positive, age play, rape, The Toybag Guide to Age Play, Bridgett "Lee" Harrington, fecal transplants, microflora imbalance, anal plugs

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Oct 16, 2014
The perils of polyamory

A poly partner who now wants monogamy, an accidental triad, and more
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, threesomes, D/s relationship, affairs, monogamy, dominance and submission, polyamory

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Sep 18, 2014
Poly bisexual ISO monogamy

Plus: A recovery plan for the shady, a kink for cochlear implants, and desensitization for the uncut
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, polyamory, bisexuality, monogamy, homosexuality, drug abuse, meth, group sex, cochlear implants, hearling loss, audiology, premature ejaculation

Columns & Opinion, Savage Love Jun 19, 2014
Polyamory prep

Plus: Fantasy fucking your partner, and reconsidering the #NotAllMen hashtag.
- By Dan Savage
- Tags: Savage Love, Dan Savage, Savage Love, monogamy, polyamory, cheating, Polyamory: Married & Dating, Showtime, Diana Adams, open relationship, fantasy, Isla Vista, Yes All Women, Not All Men, Elliot Rodger, sexism, gun violence, Phil Plait, Slate, misogyny

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