Evanston decriminalizes reefer! | Bleader

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Evanston decriminalizes reefer!

Posted By on 11.30.11 at 11:23 AM

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Good news from Evanston, my hometown.

No, they didn't beat New Trier at football—sigh. But what they did was almost as good—they decriminalized marijuana.

It happened the other night by virtue of a unanimous vote of the Evanston City Council.

In contrast to the Chicago City Council, which unanimously voted to close neighborhood mental health clinics and cut money from libraries.

Still can't get over it—not one no vote!

Back to Evanston . . .

Thanks to the new law, if you get busted with less than ten grams of marijuana, the powers that be in E-town will sock you with a fine between $50 and $500, as opposed to hauling your ass off to jail.

So now all the kids from Wilmette and Winnetka will be pouring over the town line to buy their reefer in Evanston.

Oh, wait, they already do that.

Just kidding . . .

Look, as Mick and I have been trying to tell you for the last several months, our marijuana laws are unfairly enforced and ridiculously costly.

Everybody smokes it, but only black people get busted for it.

Other than that—what a system!

Most people I know favor at least some sort of decriminalization, if only because it makes more sense than the idiocy we have now.

So, rah-rah, Evanston—time to sing your song!

Actually, there's one big-time pot head I know who favors the current laws over decriminalization.

Let's call him Pony Boy—not sure why, it's just the first thing that popped into my mind when I tried to think of a nickname that would not give away his identity.

And I don't want to give away his identity because, like I said, he smokes lots of marijuana. Which, as I was also saying, is illegal. Even though pretty much everyone does it. Or has done it. Or knows someone who's done it. Or, at the very least, laughs at jokes about doing it.

(Speaking of which, this bit by Dave Chappelle pretty much sums things up.)

Anyway, Pony Boy says he's against decriminalization on the grounds that the current system works well for him.

"As a white male, it's very unlikely that the police will bust me. For me, marijuana's already effectively legal."

And if it's decriminalized?

"Then police will probably write me up if they catch me smoking cause they'll view it as a way to raise money—like writing parking tickets. So I will be punished for something I currently get away with."

But isn't our current system unfair to the people—mostly black males—who get busted for doing what you get away with?

"Absolutely. That's why I favor legalization—not decriminalization."

Well, I guess it sort of makes sense. And he wasn't even that high when he said it.

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