"Cheetahs" Are Cougars, Except Rapists | Bleader

Friday, December 4, 2009

"Cheetahs" Are Cougars, Except Rapists

Posted By on 12.04.09 at 03:34 PM

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The "cheetah," as you surely now know, is a variety of female human who is sexually aggressive but too young to be labeled a "cougar." In other words, she is a pathetic and gross specimen of female who must be rebranded as a feline, lest she begin to suspect that desiring sex makes her, you know, human.

Men despise and fear the cheetah for her uncanny ability to prey on drunk dudes for sex, engage in a behavior known as "cock loitering," and appear "dreadful without her makeup on" the next morning. But Sady Doyle of Tiger Beatdown and I are more concerned with her uncanny ability to act suspiciously like a different class of sexual predator!

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