We here at the Reader love a good yarn about failed romance, mostly because it makes us feel better about the chilly, lonesome nights we spend sobbing into our pillows. For our Valentine's Day issue (2/8), we're asking for your least romantic stories, be it from a single nightmarish date or a long-doomed relationship. Make them clever, funny, and probably pretty bleak. And don't assume you have to be the recipient of the romantic blunder—we all make mistakes.