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Friday, February 10, 2012

OK Stupid

Posted By on 02.10.12 at 01:30 PM

In the mid-90s, when I'd moved to a new city after grad school, I placed a personals ad the old-fashioned way: in an alternative paper. After a couple of dud dates, I ended up meeting someone I went on to have a long-term relationship with. He eventually ended up reconciling with his ex-wife, but all this time later we're still friends.

Given this experience, I was open to trying online dating, so a younger colleague of mine got me started on OK Cupid. I can't say it's gone so well, though I have met a couple of guys who to all appearances are genuinely nice.

I specified in my profile that I wanted to meet locals only, but the first guy I heard from lived in California. After that, someone complimented me on my smile. I took it at face value and thanked the person, only to find out later that it was my stalker ex-boyfriend (yes, I've blocked him). Another guy described himself as a "full-figured neo-pagan." Another—who also sounds very nice and at least had the decency to be up-front about it—was looking for a "Femme dom," which I don't think I'm really up for (he was excited to hear that I edit Savage Love). And most recently a guy sent me a message saying "couldnt tempt yo with my blue eyes, education and big bulge in my pants?" Please.

Why bother, indeed?

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